Movies Are Meant to be Seen in Theaters

There are so many ways to view movies today.  Home theaters, lap tops, tablets, phones. . . . .

But I want to try and convince you that the absolute best way to experience a movie is to see it in a movie theater.  There is just no way to replace it.

Granted - there are some possible distractions.  High ticket prices and the person siting behind who crunches their popcorn for the full 2 hours . . . .

But overall, the benefits far outweigh the costs.

If I really want to see a movie, I will make sure to see it in the theater.  A mix of nostalgia, excitement, and immersion - the theater provides the ultimate environment to fully experience what the filmmaker intended.  Whenever I watch a movie I have seen in a theater at home, the depth the experience feels slightly diminished.

By the time I send out my Top 10 list in January, many of the movies on the list won't be available in theaters.  So I thought I would recommend a few movies that can be seen in theaters right now.

If you are looking for summer fun - go see these  . . .  in the theater.

I promise it will be worth it.

6 Movies for Summer Fun

#1 Baby Driver - R

Baby Driver is by far the best movie I have seen this year.  I have never seen a movie that incorporated music so seemelssly and powerfully into the story and scenes.  The director Edgar Wright has created something incredibly original here - especially the character of Baby.  It is smart, well acted and brilliantly directed.  The driving sequences alone make this worth seeing.  I hope to see it again soon - before it leaves the theater!  

Ansel Elgort is amazing in this role

#2 War for the Planet of the Apes - PG-13

I know, I know -- a movie about apes battling humans for the planet doesn't really sound like a good time.  But there is A LOT to like about this movie.  From a storytelling perspective, it works on just about every level.  It is beautifully directed (Matthew Reeves is incredibly talented), and he creates a film that is smart, thoughtful, and slow paced.  You don't even need to have seen the first two movies to enjoy this one.  To me, it is the best movie in this trilogy and probably ranks as one of the best final movies in a trilogy I have ever seen.  

Andy Serkis is the king of the CGI character

#3 Wonder Woman - PG 13

I want to be just like her when I grow up

Just about everyone saw this movie - so if you reading this, you probably have seen it.  And you probably loved it.  And you probably thought it was just awesome.  Which it was!  Gal Gadot is amazing in the role, and Patty Jenkins is the first female director to take on a big budget superhero movie.  Considering the universal appeal and financial successes of her movie, studios would be wise to hire more women to direct!

#4 Dunkirk - PG-13

Christopher Nolan's highly anticipated WWII drama was shot almost entirely using 70MM IMAX cameras. It is the most ambitious movie in history to do this.  So we paid big money to see it that way and the result was pretty unbelievable.  It is beautifully shot, and you will be astounded by the size, color, and detail in the imagery.  But it is the arial sequences that truly are special from a filming perspective.  For the first time ever, they mounted 45 pound IMAX cameras on the wings of real WWII Spitfire planes.  The end result is seeing arial dogfights that feel like you are actually there.

From a storytelling perspective, I have to admit that I was a disappointed.  There is very little dialogue and much of what is said is not understandable.  I would been more drawn in had there been additional perspectives to help the story resonate on an emotional level - perhaps scenes with Churchill and his cabinet discussing why they weren't going to rescue these soldiers.  But overall, the film is well acted and it is suspenseful from beginning to end.  You truly feel the plight of the 400,00 soldiers who are trapped helplessly on the beach at Dunkirk and the bravery of the English sailors who assisted in their rescue.   

This poster now hangs in my son's room

#5 Cars 3 - G

Not a lot of people went to this movie.  They missed out.  This movie is quietly ambitious in the themes it wants to convey and the writers were able to create a brilliant story to deal with the progression of Lightning McQueen's career and character.  About half way through, I thought it was just alright, then the story took an unexpected turn and began to fire on all cylinders (Delaney - that Dad joke was for you).  It is a fantastic movie for kids and adults.  You should definitely see it. 

Brilliant progression of Lightening's character

#6 Spider Man Homecoming - PG-13

Yes, there have been 3 different actors playing Spider Man over the last 15 years.  And yes, we may have probably all grown a little tired of the character.  But Tom Holland bring something fresh to the role, and the story returns to its roots of dealing with the troubles of high school life.  The integration with the Marvel world with Tony Stark works well.  And there are some great action sequences and funny moments.  Overall, the movie does what it sets out to do - it provides you with some good summer fun! 

Saving the world or trying to get a date to Homecoming?

Top 10 Movies 2016

Welcome back! I always enjoy making this list, and I hope you find a movie that you enjoy.

As I look over the past year, I feel it was a slow year for movies. For many months at a time, it was hard to find a great story worth seeing.

Luckily, there were a lot of high quality releases in November and December - the months when the studios release their best movies to compete for the top awards.

But even though it was a slow year overall, it was a great year for family movies. There was an unusually high number of original movies in this category, and since my kids enjoy going to the movies, we had many excellent movie going experiences this year!

So while it was a slow year in terms of quantity, there were definitely some high quality movies worth checking out.

Like in years past, I have started with a few awards, followed by my Top 10 movies of the year. I hope you enjoy the list



The First Lady Award 

Jackie - R

What would you do if you were the mother of 2 young kids, grief stricken from the death of your infant son 4 months prior, and your husband was just assassinated in a motorcade while you sat right next to him? Oh, and you are also only 34 years old, the First Lady of the United States, and need to move out of the White House to an unknown future. This movie provides some answers to these questions by highlighting what life might have been like the week following JFKs assassination. I was left with an appreciation for the difficulties she faced during this time in her life. Her conversations with journalists, political allies, family, and her priest were interesting and insightful. Natalie Portman is excellent in the title role.

The Under Appreciated Award

Queen of Katwe - PG

This movie is a wonderful look at the true story of a Ugandan teen who helped her family out of poverty through learning chess. David Oyelowo (who will forever be remembered by me as the actor who should have won an Oscar for his portrayed Martin Luther King Jr. in Selma) gives a strong performance as the chess teacher and coach who sees potential in his students and fights for their inclusion in the top tournaments. Don't let the Disney label fool you - it is not for young kids. It is slow paced, has a 2-hour run time, and focuses a lot on poverty and chess strategy - so it really won't hold the attention of your young ones. But for kids 10 and over, I think this is a great movie to see. Very few people saw this movie which is a shame. I hope you check it out. 

Family Fun

Kung Fu Panda 3 - PG

I loved the first Kung Fun Panda so much I ranked it as my #6 movie in 2008. I was disappointed by the second movie, so I had little expectations for the third. But I have to say that I absolutely loved this movie. Filled with humor, adventure, wisdom, and a lot of heart, this movie is a sure bet to win you over for a fun filled evening.

Finding Dory - PG

When Finding Dory is your 5th favorite kids movie, you know its been a strong year for family entertainment. It wasn't one of Pixar's best movies, but it was funny, entertaining, and taught wonderful lessons about family and friendship.

The Dancing During the Credits Award

Trolls - PG

The story won't stay with you long (I can barely remember what it is about), but this movie is just plain fun. Ana Kendrick and Justin Timberlake voice to the two main characters and sing some memorable songs. It is funny, the music is fantastic, and by the time the credits rolled, my 6-year old daughter Makenzie and I were dancing in our seats. 

The Comeback Award

Jason Bourne - PG-13

I was completely burned out on these movies by the time the third one came out. So I was pleasantly surprised to enjoy this movie so much after a 10 year layoff. It was smart for a 4th installment, and it was a great movie to watch with my son during our summer vacation. Before seeing it, we enjoyed watching The Bourne Identity (2002) and the Bourne Supremacy (2004) as well. 

The Studio Award: Marvel vs. DC

Captain America Civil War vs. Superman vs Batman 

This was the year of in-fighting among the superheros. Captain America vs. Iron Man. Superman vs. Batman. Marvel vs DC. While Marvel is riding an unbelievable streak of quality movie after quality movie (Civil War was as good as they get), DC is imploding with Zack Snyder at the helm. His specialty - angst ridden superheros with lots of exploding buildings - but without any humor or lightheartedness that Marvel excels at - isn't really working. Marvel on the other hand never misses - even when they use no name directors and make movies of obscure characters few have even heard of (Dr. Strange, Ant Man, Guardians of the Galaxy). Yet all of those movies worked at an extremely high level.

To add insult to injury, Marvel even dominates the battle off screen. For a great laugh, watch here as Thor reacts to being excluded from the Civil War movie, while DC's bad reviews and unhappy fans produced a different type of reaction in Ben Affleck.  

            

 
The Expected More Award 

Manchester by the Sea - R

While Critics lauded this as the best movie of 2016, I hoped for more. Yes, it is well acted and directed, it feels real and honest, and it has an interesting story. But I just didn't fully connect with it. There were a few memorable scenes that will stay with me, but overall, I don't think this is a must see. I especially wouldn't recommend it if you are looking for a feel good movie. But if you are in the mood for a somber, slow developing character study that examines the impact of personal tragedy and loss on an individual and his family, it is a fine recommendation.

2016 Top 10 Movies

10. Allied - R

If you need one reason to see this movie, it is Marion Cotillard.  She is such an amazing actress she seems to make everyone else around her look ordinary. If you need a second reason to see this movie, it is because director Robert Zemeckis (Cast Away, Back to the Future) uses the camera in original ways to heighten suspense and deepen the story. If you need a reason to skip this movie it is because Brad Pitt really shows what a limited acting range he has. During the movie, I kept thinking to myself, "he really isn't that good of an actor." A few minutes later, I heard the guy behind me whisper to his friend, "he really isn't that good of an actor." Still, I think it is worth seeing. It stayed with me after I left the theater. 

 

9.  The Edge of Seventeen - R

During the 1980s, John Hughes was the first to make movies to truly capture the teenage experience. I think he would be proud of The Edge of Seventeen.  Hailey Steinfeld (nominated for an Oscar at 13 for True Grit) gives an excellent portrayal of an angst ridden teen in high school. The writing is sharp, funny, and honest. Woody Harrelson is great as her English teacher. Their interplay, although a minor part of the story, is one of the best elements of the movie.  

8.  Moana - PG

Each Thanksgiving day I take my kids to see a movie. This year, Moana made our tradition special. Moana tells an amazing story, has beautiful animation, and contains original music that is clever and inspirational. The songs "How Far I'll Go" "You're Welcome" and "Shiny"are as good as any songs Disney has released. The story is deeper than you might expect with an emphasis on ancestry and nature. My 12 year-old daughter saw this twice and loved it even more the second time. I am excited to see it again. I think that this movie will be a Disney classic in 15 years when the kids who saw it in theaters become adults.     

7.  Zootopia - PG

This movie was smart, topical, and incredibly entertaining. For kids, this is a perfect introduction to a mystery genre - with lots of twists and turns that they will never see coming. For adults, it was a sharply written commentary on race relations. Add in Judy Hopp's eternal enthusiasm and optimism, and you have a hit! I am guessing most of you have already seen it, but if you haven't, it is available on Netflix.

6.  Pete's Dragon - PG

I am so glad I got to see this with my daughters - they were both at the perfect ages to truly enjoy it. This is a remake of the original 1977 Disney movie which produced the beautiful song Candle on the Water by Helen Reddy. Although there is no music in this movie, it is touching in so many ways. The movie is heart warming and magical, and is an example of why we love to go to the movies in the first place.

5. Arrival - PG-13

This may be the best science fiction movie I have seen. It was so refreshing to see an intelligent look at what it might be like to encounter life from another planet. Instead of exploding monuments and unlikely victories, this movie examines the importance of language in establishing a relationship with alien life forms. Although our heroes never hold a gun or say catch phrases like "get off our planet", this movie is gripping from beginning to end.

4.  While We're Young - R

Technically this movie was released in 2015, but I had to include it here as it was the most satisfying movie experience I had this year. Noah Baumbach was hailed as few years back as a great director for the Squid and the Whale (a movie I hated). But he hits it out of the park with this one. A couple in their mid-forties begins a friendship with a younger couple and begin to reexamine their lives and decisions. It was the strongest screenplay of any movie I saw this year. To me, it felt like a perfect blend of a Woody Allen movie (with less neurotic characters) and a Wes Anderson movie (with less quirkiness).

Quick Sidebar: Adam Driver (a.k.a. Kylo Ren) is quickly becoming one of my favorite new actors. If you haven't seen Kylo's appearance on Undercover Boss, you should really check it out.

3.  Sing Street  PG-13

When my wife and I saw this movie in March, we thought that we might have just seen the best movie of the year. Set in the mid 1980s, the movie tells the story of an Irish teen who forms a band in order to win over a girl. Directed by John Carney (Once) the movie pays homage to the music of the 1980s while also containing original music written specifically for the movie. The movie is a rich story of adolescent discovery, and it provides a look at what it means to be an artist who pursues one's dreams with fearlessness. It is a deeper movie that you would think. If you have any affinity for  music of the 1980s, this is an absolute must see. It is now available on Netflix.

2.  Moonlight - R

This movie tells the story of a young boy at three different phases of life and explores how race, sexual-orientation, peer-abuse, and societies expectations for masculinity shaped his identify and self-expression. Writer/Director Barry Jenkins does an incredible job with the story instilling in the viewer empathy and love towards the main character. Jenkin's ability to maintain the character's consistency across the three chapters was remarkable - especially since he is played by different actors in each phase. It was incredible that the actors were able to maintain the heart of the character given the ever changing circumstances he is in over the course of his life. It is heartbreaking at times, yet also beautiful in many ways. It stays with you long after you leave the theater. A.O Scott - a film critic for the New York Times, provides an insightful review of this movie here.

1.  La La Land - PG-13

Damien Chazelle is only 31 years old. 31! For him to write and direct this movie at that age is astounding. The movie is an original and visually vibrant. It feels like a tribute to the Hollywood musicals and love stories of the past. Emma Stone lights up the screen. Seeing her acting abilities is worth the price of admission alone. The musical numbers were fantastic. The choreography was beautiful. And the screenplay was an incredible accomplishment. This was a wonderful movie all around. I am hoping it wins big at the Oscars.  

Until next year have fun at the movies!!!

Top 10 Books 2016

Below are my Top 10 book recommendations based on books I read or re-read in 2016. Whether it was discovering something for the first time, or reading a book 25 years later, there were some great stories that challenged and inspired me.  I have listed 5 non-fiction and 5 fiction titles below.  I hope you find something you enjoy.

Top 5 Non-Fiction

#5. The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up (2014)

You know you have written an effective book when your last name becomes a commonly used verb used in households on cleaning days. I have always tried to live as a minimalist, so I agreed at the outset with much of what she says. But she gave me some new perspectives on decluttering and provided useful tools and tips that can easily be put into practice. I really love how my clothes now stand after being folded. We knew this had made an impact on our family when our 6-year old starting "Kondoing" her clothes on laundry day. 

#4.  10% Happier (2014)

This is the story of a journalist's discovery of mindfulness meditation after he had an on-air panic attack while reading the news on Good Morning America. I found it engaging that he brought a skeptical perspective to the story, and rather than just providing the science behind mindfulness (there are plenty of other books which do that), he integrates the topic with his journalistic work. I would recommend it to anyone searching to know what mindfulness meditation is and how it might be able to help them.  

#3.  A Fighting Chance (2014)

I love Elizabeth Warren. The senator from Massachusetts began her work as a lawyer and university professor. The story of her working to get those jobs is incredible in and of itself. In addition to a personal memoir, the book details her work on important issues for working families - namely advocating for proper bankruptcy protection, proposing affordable college education for students, & protecting vulnerable families from dishonest creditors. Her message is clear - she wants every working family to have a fighting chance to succeed in America and not be vulnerable to a larger system that is favored to protect corporations and the wealthy. The memoir is well written and interesting. It is compelling as it documents her family life, her academic life, and her political life. When my daughters are old enough, I will have them read this book. Warren is a role model and example of the kind of woman I would want my daughters to become. If they can be strong like her and stand up for what they believe, then they will part of the next generation to have a fighting chance.  

Post script: She also played a huge role in getting the Wells Fargo CEO to step down and forfeit 41 million dollars in unvested equity after the companies recent financial cross-selling scandal. It might not be as entertaining as Thor's video, but you can watch here as she interviews him and calls for accountability from the now former CEO.

#2.  Radical Acceptance (2000)

Tara Brach has an uncanny ability to clarify complex psychological concepts. Her integration of Buddhist meditation practices into psychotherapy is nothing short of revolutionary. If I weren't already a Mormon, I am sure I would be a Buddhist. I have integrated many of the ideas in this book into my clinical practice and teaching and I believe it has made a huge difference. 

#1. The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People (1989)

I was fortunate to read this book in 1990 when I was 20 year old. I read it several times that year and it shaped my philosophy of life in dramatic ways. Twenty-five years later, the book not only holds up, it may have gotten even gotten better. This is not your typical self-help book that proposes quick fixes to complex problems. Rather, the book advocates for the development of character through habits of effectiveness. Covey makes it clear at the outset that the road is not easy. Rather, it requires the virtues of discipline, awareness, understanding, and commitment. If you have not read this book, don't let the publication year scare you aware. This is one of my all-time favorite books. I give it my highest recommendation.  

Top 5 Fiction

#5. A Tale of Two Cities (1859)

I don't read a lot of classics, but I bought this as an audio book and decided to give it a chance. At first, I had a hard time appreciating it, but at the half way point, that all changed. 


Charles Darnay and Sydney Carton are now two of my favorite characters in any book. There is such a nobility to these men in the face of horrible circumstances. I was totally unprepared to feel dramatic tension in the book (if would have told me before reading it there would be suspense, I would have laughed). The only word I can use to describe the description of the French Revolution is chilling.  This is my first real foray into a true classic, and I was unexpectedly rewarded.

#4. Orphan Train (2013)

This little known chapter in US history is beautifully captured by the author. The story feels real and I was deeply moved by it. I especially appreciated that the author did so much research on this issue - every element felt genuine and authentic and the characters were beautifully painted. It was like I was there. I would recommend it to anyone.

#3. Ready Player One (2011)

This book is a fantastic nostalgic trip back to 1980s movies, video games, music, and television. The story was creative and smart. I found the characters incredibly interesting, and I loved the blurring of the lines between reality and virtual reality. I was engrossed from beginning to end. I continue to think about it often. I would especially recommend it to anyone born between 1965-1975 who loved pop culture in the 1980s. If that is you, you are in for a real treat.

#2. Everything I Never Told You (2014)

I loved the author's ability to create a complex family narrative that so eloquently captured the unique perspectives of all the members - father, mother, brother, two sisters. After the couple's 16-year old daughter is found dead (not a spoiler, it's the first sentence of the book), the story explores the aftermath of this tragedy for the family, as well as the histories of the father and mother leading up to that point. An essential component of the story is the theme of living in an interracial family in Ohio in the 1970s. The father is a well educated Chinese American man born of poor immigrant parents, and the mother is a White American woman who gave up her education to raise a family. At a time when interracial marriage was illegal in some states, the portrait of what it must have been like for the couple and for the children felt genuine and incredibly insightful. I was surprised to love the book so much. I was so impressed by Ng's ability to articulate the subtleties of interpersonal relationships. The story is a simple human drama that slowly builds to a very satisfying conclusion.

#1. The Book Thief (2006)

I have a habit of starting books, then stopping them if they don't hold my interest. In 2006, I started The Book Thief and then stopped after 50 pages. Ten years later, I am so glad to have read it. Zusak develops the character so completely that you feel as if they are your personal friends. And of course, you miss them when it is all over. The author also took a huge risk in having Death be the narrator of the book. In 2006, I didn't like that - it felt contrived. But this year, I saw it differently and felt that it worked amazingly well as a story-telling convention. This is my 15 year-old son's favorite book - he has read it many times. We got to listen to much of it together during our mornings together in the car.  I loved discussing it with him.  If you only read one book on this list, this would be the one I recommend.

Top 10 Books 2015

This is a movie blog, I know.  But I have always also wanted to make a Top 10 list of books.   The problem is, I only read about 4 to 5 books each year - never enough to even come close to making a list.  To bypass this list and go straight to the movies, just click the post to the right.

I love to read, don't get me wrong.  But I am a slow reader, and it is work for me - especially at the end of a long day, and especially non-fiction.

But this year, I made a life changing discovery - audiobooks from Audible.com.

I have to confess that I used to wonder how anyone could listen to an audio book.  I thought it was cheating, wasn't really reading, and was impossible to have a rich experience.

Well, I was wrong.

I listened to my first audiobook on a fluke.  One day I started listening to a book on my way to work. Then I listened on my way home.  Then I did it the next day and the next.

Before long I saw I could listen to two books a month without really doing anything differently in my day than I normally do.

It has opened up a whole new world of possibilities.  Because of this, I can keep current with all the books I want to read, while also reading many I have always wanted to but could never find the time.

I set an outrageous goal this year to read at least 25 books.  Amazingly, I exceeded it.  It is basically six times the books I typically read in a given year.  And I have loved every minute of it.

This is not to say that I will be letting go of reading books the old fashioned way. That is particularly true for reading fiction.  When I travel, reading on a plane or at a hotel is one of the things I love the most.  Plus, I love to own books, appreciate their cover-art, and fill up my bookshelves.

It might be crazy for me to say it, but I may have enjoyed reading books more this year than attending movies . .  . . . . That is just crazy . . . . . . it is a sure sign I am getting old.

I made two lists - one for non-fiction and one for fiction.  I hope you find something you can enjoy.

Top 10 Non-Fiction

I can wholeheartedly recommend all of the books below to you without reservation.

10. The Science of Trust (2011)

I very much enjoyed this exploration of trust in couple relationships. John Gottman is the country's foremost expert on marriage. His research has been invaluable in helping us know why marriages succeed and why they fail.  This books adds a missing ingredient to the first 20 years of his research - how emotional attunement is the key to developing trust and emotional bonds in a relationship.












9. This is the Story of a Happy Marriage (2013)

Bel Canto was a great work of fiction. This book shows Patchett's talents as a non-fiction writer. This is a collection of essays she has written over the course of her career. The best essays were The Getaway Car, The Sacrament of Divorce, and a freshman convocation at Clemson University called The Right to Read.

8. Love Sense (2013)

In therapy circles, Sue Johnson is the number one authority on improving couple relationships by strengthening attachment bonds. I use her text on Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (EFT) for my graduate students, but this book is more accessible and is written for a general audience. The book is well written. It is grounded in scientific research, advances in neuroscience, and years of significant clinical experience. She provides an understandable explanations that help demystify love, and she provides a clear road map for how couples can make sense of what previously seemed impossible to understand - namely how couple conflict and erosion often stems from a lack of safe and secure emotional bonds, and how learning to express one's attachment needs to a responsive partner can build emotional bonds that last a lifetime. As a couple therapist, I can attest to the truth of what she says here.

7. In Defense of Food (2008)

My wife, 11 year-old daughter, and I listened to this together on our summer vacation this year.  We have always been big believers in what is written here so we were already eating a lot like he recommends.  But this book is a must read for anyone who wants to understand why the Western diet is so unhealthy. Michael Pollan is a gifted journalist and funny writer and he makes the experience educational and interesting.  His advice, "Eat food, mostly plants, not too much" is just brilliant and is explained in great detail throughout the book. 

6. The Gifts of Imperfection (2010)

This book was a revelation! I came across it on a fluke after watching her incredibly popular Tedx Talk on the Power of Vulnerability.  It is the 4th most watched Ted Talk of all time and has been view over 22 million times.

Brene Brown has the rare ability to translate academic research into meaningful ideas that can directly impact our lives. Brown bases her book on 8 years of research on shame. If you are like most people, reading a book about shame doesn't sound like a good time, I know. But I have to say that this is one of the most meaningful books I have read in the past 10 years. Brown coins the new phrase "wholehearted living" to define a group of people who live life with their whole hearts, a group who are able to take risks and be emotionally vulnerable. In doing so, they discover increased courage, compassion, and connections with others. This book made an immediate impact on my therapy practice, and it has given me much to think about in how I can better live a more authentic life. 

5.  The Mindful Brain (2007)

I cannot say enough good things about this book.  I read it for the second time this year.  It is really just a wonderful and insightful look into the new field of interpersonal neuroscience.  The book discusses how the outcomes of secure parent-child attachments can also be found in the outcomes of mindfulness meditation. All my students know I will add mindfulness to every lecture I can, and this book was my first real exposure to the possibilities and benefits of mindfulness.  Studies have shown that practicing mindfulness meditation for as little as 8 weeks has been shown to reduce depression and anxiety, improve physical health and immunity, and improve interpersonal attunement, empathy, and relationships.  I am a total believer in this and I practice it myself every day.  I have read both the hard copy and listened to the audiobook, and I would recommend the audiobook - it more accessible than the hard copy and also included a few mindfulness exercises.

4. David & Goliath (2013)

Malcolm Gladwell is a unique story teller.  The premise of this book is that what we oftentimes see as our strengths can actually be a disadvantage, and what we oftentimes see as a disadvantage, can actually be a strength. 

I particularly enjoyed his analysis of the impact of small classroom size on learning, how dyslexia might be a "desirable disadvantage," and how Martin Luther King and other civil rights leaders created social change through their marginalized positions.  The "big pond" theory was tremendous and worth the read in and of itself - particularly as it related to higher education. 

3. Man's Search for Meaning (1946)

To put it simply, if I could only have 5 books while stranded on a desert island for the rest of my life, this would be one of them. 

I read this a second time 22 years after reading it the first time. With age and experience, I was much better able to understand the message he conveys.  This book is a personal account of one man's experience in a concentration camp, and it is an unparalleled exploration of the psychology of how suffering caused by unavoidable circumstances can either be a cause for despair and hopelessness, or a vehicle for growth and progression.

The book is ultimately about finding meaning in life and making sense of our suffering.  The message of the book - that love and beauty can come from our greatest suffering is perhaps one of the greatest messages of hope that exist in all of literature.

2. Quiet (2012)  

This book was the most comprehensive and insight psychologically based book I have read since discovering the Road Less Traveled 25 years ago. Susan Cain has done an amazing job not only helping others to see how introversion/extroversion plays out in the dominant US culture, but she has compiled a wealth of psychological studies that are summarized with stunning clarity and brilliant personal insight.  

A few of the highlights of this book include her summary of the emerging body of research on 'high reactive' and 'sensitive' temperaments in Chapter 4-5. And Chapter 6 which details how the introversion of Eleanor Roosevelt balanced FDR's extroversion is an exceptional piece of research and writing.

I have taken the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) Test 3 times over the past 25 years. Each time I regrettably scored as an introvert. For years, I was embarrassed by this label as I felt it meant I was destined to be shy, socially awkward, and not outgoing. However, this book has helped me see that those are inaccurate myths and that introversion carries with it a host of strengths.  It also helped me better understand why I chose to be a professor and a therapist.

#1 Non-Fiction Book (Tie)

1. I am Malala (2013)

Malala Yousafzai is a hero of mine.  This is an amazing story, and I absolutely recommend it to you.  I have always been impressed with Malala ever since I heard her story and saw her speech at the UN about the importance of education for girls. She is also the youngest person to win the Nobel Peace Prize - at only 18 years old. 

Malala is one of the truly unique and special individuals who are revolutionaries - people whose actions can change the world. I don't think it is an exaggeration to mention her in the same breath as individuals like Ghandi, Mother Theresa, Martin Luther King Jr., and Nelson Mandela. And for her to do what she has done as a young girl in a war torn country filled with men who were killing those who spoke out against their ways - well, it just goes beyond what is even conceivable.

She stands for things that are truly important - education for girls, equal rights for women, forgiving others who have harmed you, and having the convictions to fight for what you believe in. And she has overcome emotional and physical trauma and continues to rise above it in her fight for education for girls throughout the world. 

Malala's story should be read by everyone. I am proud to say it was the inaugural book in the bookclub I started with my graduate students in October of this year.  My 11-year old daughter read the book and participated in the bookclub which made me feel proud, as this is the entire point of Malala's message.  

1. The Boys in the Boat (2013) 

Put simply, Daniel James Brown’s book is the best work of non-fiction I have ever read. It goes beyond a simple re-telling of a historical event and manages to capture the highest ideals of the human spirit. Contrasted with the historical bleakness of the great depression and Germany’s ascension to power in the 1930s, Brown’s telling of the story of the 9 men who rowed to Olympic gold in 1936 captured my attention and emotions like few books I have ever read.  Even though you learn this fact from the first page, you rarely think it is at all possible. In a very real way, it is hard for me to believe that this story is even true. 

The emotional center of the book is Joe Rantz – a young man who endured enormous hardship to earn a spot on the boat.  And the wisdom of the book is found in George Yeoman Pocock – the famed British shellbuilder. In the lives of Rantz and his teammates, the virtues of work, humility, and sacrifice are contrasted with stunning clarity to the vices of corruption, power, and hatred in the German government in the 1930s. The way Brown intertwines the two stories is brilliant, and the book doubles as an in-depth history lesson to the events leading up to World War II. 

The power of this book is in Brown’s ability to describe the transcendent nature of the connection the boys developed through rowing - how when each member of the crew truly gave up the self and fully trusted in the others, they achieved something far greater than personal accomplishment and success; that in their words they experienced something that approached the divine. 

Top 10 Fiction

10.  Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance (1974)

I have wanted to read this book for 20 years after my favorite professor in college recommended it to me.  I finally did it.  I'm not sure it holds up as well as it did in the 70s and 80s, but the intersection between philosophy, mental illness, and a father-son relationship made it interesting.

9. Bel Canto (2001)

Obviously I am quite late to the party on this - like 14 years late. But my wife read this for her bookclub and recommended it to me. And she is my ultimate referral source for fiction.  Anytime she recommends something for me to read, I almost always love it.  For the record, she recommended that I read 7 of the 10 books on this list - thank you, Krista! 

Like all great authors, Ann Patchett has the ability to incorporate small bits of insight about life into the nuances of her characters. It was an intriguing examination of the beauty of opera and life inside a 4 1/2-month long hostage stand off.  A crazy combination, but it worked.

8. Hamlet Prince of Denmark (2014)

Another book recommended to me by my wife, and sure enough it was great. This book was adapted from the play specifically to be performed as an audiobook as a dramatized novel. The themes here are the big ones: power, politics, betrayal, revenge, family, love, loyalty, & tragedy. I saw the actual play about a month later - and while the play was fantastic - I actually enjoyed this telling of the story a lot more.

7. The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian (2007)

I read this book in 2008 and again this year.  It is an excellent book about an adolescent boy living on a Indian reservation in Washington.  It's funny and insightful and contains some excellent character development.  This is a great story about the importance of one's culture, finding your way in the world through struggle and hard work, and ultimately about the importance of friendship.  

6. All the Light We Cannot See (2014)

This won the Pulitzer Prize this year and I can see why. The author packs intense imagery into every sentence and each chapter was never more than 2-3 pages. You would think this would fail, but it worked. I was interested the whole time, and the story is multi-layered and thought provoking. 

5. The Snow Child (2012)

I would have never read this book without the recommendation of my wife, and I am so glad I did. First time novelist Eowyn Ivey wrote a book that is difficult to capture - but what I loved most was the explorations of love, loss, grief, and joy - as experienced through marriage, friendship, and the love of a child.  It has a beautiful emotional tone and a fairy tale like quality.  Maybe the best way for me to characterize it is a beautiful bedtime story for adults - one that you would want a loved one to tell to you as you sat near a fire wrapped in a warm blanket.

4. Beautiful Ruins (2012)

Timing is everything. In 2013, I started this book, only to stop as I couldn't connect with it. I picked it up again this past year and absolutely loved it. It is the 3rd Jess Walter book I have read, and I have enjoyed each of them immensely (The Financial Lives of the Poets and his collection of short stories We Live in Water). He writes about darker characters, but I enjoy his insights and stories.

What I love most about this book was the pure originality of the story telling - bouncing between 1962 Italy and present day Hollywood. He delivers full chapters in various forms that really show his command as a writer.  If you are looking for an original and intelligent book - one that may make you laugh, cry, and reflect, I think you will like Beautiful Ruins.

3.  What Alice Forgot (2011)

I guess it goes without saying who recommended this book to me. This is a brilliant book about the passage of time and the slow erosion of relationships. The main character gets a concussion only to forget the last 10 years of her life - she thinks that she and her husband are newly in love and expecting their first child. However, in reality, she is filing for divorce and has 3 kids under 10. It sounds a bit corny, but it is a powerful plot design, and it worked on every level. I give the author a lot of credit for making this such a compelling book. I loved it from beginning to end.

2. A Man Called Ove (2013)

I absolutely loved this book from the first chapter and it never let up. I loved the story, the characters, and the author's ability to seamlessly use similes that always made me laugh. What a wonderful and warm character study of a 59-year old Swedish curmudgeon. The book was also laugh-out-loud funny and unexpectedly moving.

1. Euphoria (2014)  

This was my favorite fiction book this year, and it wasn't even close. I loved it so much that I read it twice within 3 months.  It is a fictionalized account of Margaret Mead's anthropological studies of the tribes of New Guinea in the 1920s. 

Lily King's words are like poetry to me. There were many times when I would shake my head in amazement at her ability to capture the complexities of an experience in a single sentence - when she could capture the subjective realities and relationships of her characters just as precisely and exactly as I could possibly imagine. 

I loved the beauty of the story and the exploration of anthropology. It is a field I would have deeply enjoyed.  The book provides rich observations about human nature and relationships. It worked on every level for me.