I love to read, don't get me wrong. But I am a slow reader, and it is work for me - especially at the end of a long day, and especially non-fiction.
But this year, I made a life changing discovery - audiobooks from Audible.com.
I have to confess that I used to wonder how anyone could listen to an audio book. I thought it was cheating, wasn't really reading, and was impossible to have a rich experience.
Well, I was wrong.
I listened to my first audiobook on a fluke. One day I started listening to a book on my way to work. Then I listened on my way home. Then I did it the next day and the next.
Before long I saw I could listen to two books a month without really doing anything differently in my day than I normally do.
It has opened up a whole new world of possibilities. Because of this, I can keep current with all the books I want to read, while also reading many I have always wanted to but could never find the time.
I set an outrageous goal this year to read at least 25 books. Amazingly, I exceeded it. It is basically six times the books I typically read in a given year. And I have loved every minute of it.
This is not to say that I will be letting go of reading books the old fashioned way. That is particularly true for reading fiction. When I travel, reading on a plane or at a hotel is one of the things I love the most. Plus, I love to own books, appreciate their cover-art, and fill up my bookshelves.
It might be crazy for me to say it, but I may have enjoyed reading books more this year than attending movies . . . . . . That is just crazy . . . . . . it is a sure sign I am getting old.
I made two lists - one for non-fiction and one for fiction. I hope you find something you can enjoy.
Top 10 Non-Fiction
I can wholeheartedly recommend all of the books below to you without reservation.
10. The Science of Trust (2011)
I very much enjoyed this exploration of trust in couple relationships. John Gottman is the country's foremost expert on marriage. His research has been invaluable in helping us know why marriages succeed and why they fail. This books adds a missing ingredient to the first 20 years of his research - how emotional attunement is the key to developing trust and emotional bonds in a relationship.
9. This is the Story of a Happy Marriage (2013)
Bel Canto was a great work of fiction. This book shows Patchett's talents as a non-fiction writer. This is a collection of essays she has written over the course of her career. The best essays were The Getaway Car, The Sacrament of Divorce, and a freshman convocation at Clemson University called The Right to Read.
8. Love Sense (2013)
In therapy circles, Sue Johnson is the number one authority on improving couple relationships by strengthening attachment bonds. I use her text on Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (EFT) for my graduate students, but this book is more accessible and is written for a general audience. The book is well written. It is grounded in scientific research, advances in neuroscience, and years of significant clinical experience. She provides an understandable explanations that help demystify love, and she provides a clear road map for how couples can make sense of what previously seemed impossible to understand - namely how couple conflict and erosion often stems from a lack of safe and secure emotional bonds, and how learning to express one's attachment needs to a responsive partner can build emotional bonds that last a lifetime. As a couple therapist, I can attest to the truth of what she says here.
This book was a revelation! I came across it on a fluke after watching her incredibly popular Tedx Talk on the Power of Vulnerability. It is the 4th most watched Ted Talk of all time and has been view over 22 million times.
Brene Brown has the rare ability to translate academic research into meaningful ideas that can directly impact our lives. Brown bases her book on 8 years of research on shame. If you are like most people, reading a book about shame doesn't sound like a good time, I know. But I have to say that this is one of the most meaningful books I have read in the past 10 years. Brown coins the new phrase "wholehearted living" to define a group of people who live life with their whole hearts, a group who are able to take risks and be emotionally vulnerable. In doing so, they discover increased courage, compassion, and connections with others. This book made an immediate impact on my therapy practice, and it has given me much to think about in how I can better live a more authentic life.
I cannot say enough good things about this book. I read it for the second time this year. It is really just a wonderful and insightful look into the new field of interpersonal neuroscience. The book discusses how the outcomes of secure parent-child attachments can also be found in the outcomes of mindfulness meditation. All my students know I will add mindfulness to every lecture I can, and this book was my first real exposure to the possibilities and benefits of mindfulness. Studies have shown that practicing mindfulness meditation for as little as 8 weeks has been shown to reduce depression and anxiety, improve physical health and immunity, and improve interpersonal attunement, empathy, and relationships. I am a total believer in this and I practice it myself every day. I have read both the hard copy and listened to the audiobook, and I would recommend the audiobook - it more accessible than the hard copy and also included a few mindfulness exercises.
I particularly enjoyed his analysis of the impact of small classroom size on learning, how dyslexia might be a "desirable disadvantage," and how Martin Luther King and other civil rights leaders created social change through their marginalized positions. The "big pond" theory was tremendous and worth the read in and of itself - particularly as it related to higher education.
To put it simply, if I could only have 5 books while stranded on a desert island for the rest of my life, this would be one of them.
I read this a second time 22 years after reading it the first time. With age and experience, I was much better able to understand the message he conveys. This book is a personal account of one man's experience in a concentration camp, and it is an unparalleled exploration of the psychology of how suffering caused by unavoidable circumstances can either be a cause for despair and hopelessness, or a vehicle for growth and progression.
The book is ultimately about finding meaning in life and making sense of our suffering. The message of the book - that love and beauty can come from our greatest suffering is perhaps one of the greatest messages of hope that exist in all of literature.
This book was the most comprehensive and insight psychologically based book I have read since discovering the Road Less Traveled 25 years ago. Susan Cain has done an amazing job not only helping others to see how introversion/extroversion plays out in the dominant US culture, but she has compiled a wealth of psychological studies that are summarized with stunning clarity and brilliant personal insight.
A few of the highlights of this book include her summary of the emerging body of research on 'high reactive' and 'sensitive' temperaments in Chapter 4-5. And Chapter 6 which details how the introversion of Eleanor Roosevelt balanced FDR's extroversion is an exceptional piece of research and writing.
I have taken the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) Test 3 times over the past 25 years. Each time I regrettably scored as an introvert. For years, I was embarrassed by this label as I felt it meant I was destined to be shy, socially awkward, and not outgoing. However, this book has helped me see that those are inaccurate myths and that introversion carries with it a host of strengths. It also helped me better understand why I chose to be a professor and a therapist.
Malala is one of the truly unique and special individuals who are revolutionaries - people whose actions can change the world. I don't think it is an exaggeration to mention her in the same breath as individuals like Ghandi, Mother Theresa, Martin Luther King Jr., and Nelson Mandela. And for her to do what she has done as a young girl in a war torn country filled with men who were killing those who spoke out against their ways - well, it just goes beyond what is even conceivable.
She stands for things that are truly important - education for girls, equal rights for women, forgiving others who have harmed you, and having the convictions to fight for what you believe in. And she has overcome emotional and physical trauma and continues to rise above it in her fight for education for girls throughout the world.
Malala's story should be read by everyone. I am proud to say it was the inaugural book in the bookclub I started with my graduate students in October of this year. My 11-year old daughter read the book and participated in the bookclub which made me feel proud, as this is the entire point of Malala's message.
Put simply, Daniel James Brown’s book is the best work of non-fiction I have ever read. It goes beyond a simple re-telling of a historical event and manages to capture the highest ideals of the human spirit. Contrasted with the historical bleakness of the great depression and Germany’s ascension to power in the 1930s, Brown’s telling of the story of the 9 men who rowed to Olympic gold in 1936 captured my attention and emotions like few books I have ever read. Even though you learn this fact from the first page, you rarely think it is at all possible. In a very real way, it is hard for me to believe that this story is even true.
The emotional center of the book is Joe Rantz – a young man who endured enormous hardship to earn a spot on the boat. And the wisdom of the book is found in George Yeoman Pocock – the famed British shellbuilder. In the lives of Rantz and his teammates, the virtues of work, humility, and sacrifice are contrasted with stunning clarity to the vices of corruption, power, and hatred in the German government in the 1930s. The way Brown intertwines the two stories is brilliant, and the book doubles as an in-depth history lesson to the events leading up to World War II.
The power of this book is in Brown’s ability to describe the transcendent nature of the connection the boys developed through rowing - how when each member of the crew truly gave up the self and fully trusted in the others, they achieved something far greater than personal accomplishment and success; that in their words they experienced something that approached the divine.
10. Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance (1974)
I have wanted to read this book for 20 years after my favorite professor in college recommended it to me. I finally did it. I'm not sure it holds up as well as it did in the 70s and 80s, but the intersection between philosophy, mental illness, and a father-son relationship made it interesting.
Obviously I am quite late to the party on this - like 14 years late. But my wife read this for her bookclub and recommended it to me. And she is my ultimate referral source for fiction. Anytime she recommends something for me to read, I almost always love it. For the record, she recommended that I read 7 of the 10 books on this list - thank you, Krista!
Like all great authors, Ann Patchett has the ability to incorporate small bits of insight about life into the nuances of her characters. It was an intriguing examination of the beauty of opera and life inside a 4 1/2-month long hostage stand off. A crazy combination, but it worked.
I read this book in 2008 and again this year. It is an excellent book about an adolescent boy living on a Indian reservation in Washington. It's funny and insightful and contains some excellent character development. This is a great story about the importance of one's culture, finding your way in the world through struggle and hard work, and ultimately about the importance of friendship.
This won the Pulitzer Prize this year and I can see why. The author packs intense imagery into every sentence and each chapter was never more than 2-3 pages. You would think this would fail, but it worked. I was interested the whole time, and the story is multi-layered and thought provoking.
Timing is everything. In 2013, I started this book, only to stop as I couldn't connect with it. I picked it up again this past year and absolutely loved it. It is the 3rd Jess Walter book I have read, and I have enjoyed each of them immensely (The Financial Lives of the Poets and his collection of short stories We Live in Water). He writes about darker characters, but I enjoy his insights and stories.
What I love most about this book was the pure originality of the story telling - bouncing between 1962 Italy and present day Hollywood. He delivers full chapters in various forms that really show his command as a writer. If you are looking for an original and intelligent book - one that may make you laugh, cry, and reflect, I think you will like Beautiful Ruins.
I guess it goes without saying who recommended this book to me. This is a brilliant book about the passage of time and the slow erosion of relationships. The main character gets a concussion only to forget the last 10 years of her life - she thinks that she and her husband are newly in love and expecting their first child. However, in reality, she is filing for divorce and has 3 kids under 10. It sounds a bit corny, but it is a powerful plot design, and it worked on every level. I give the author a lot of credit for making this such a compelling book. I loved it from beginning to end.
This was my favorite fiction book this year, and it wasn't even close. I loved it so much that I read it twice within 3 months. It is a fictionalized account of Margaret Mead's anthropological studies of the tribes of New Guinea in the 1920s.
Lily King's words are like poetry to me. There were many times when I would shake my head in amazement at her ability to capture the complexities of an experience in a single sentence - when she could capture the subjective realities and relationships of her characters just as precisely and exactly as I could possibly imagine.
I loved the beauty of the story and the exploration of anthropology. It is a field I would have deeply enjoyed. The book provides rich observations about human nature and relationships. It worked on every level for me.
9. This is the Story of a Happy Marriage (2013)
Bel Canto was a great work of fiction. This book shows Patchett's talents as a non-fiction writer. This is a collection of essays she has written over the course of her career. The best essays were The Getaway Car, The Sacrament of Divorce, and a freshman convocation at Clemson University called The Right to Read.
8. Love Sense (2013)
In therapy circles, Sue Johnson is the number one authority on improving couple relationships by strengthening attachment bonds. I use her text on Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (EFT) for my graduate students, but this book is more accessible and is written for a general audience. The book is well written. It is grounded in scientific research, advances in neuroscience, and years of significant clinical experience. She provides an understandable explanations that help demystify love, and she provides a clear road map for how couples can make sense of what previously seemed impossible to understand - namely how couple conflict and erosion often stems from a lack of safe and secure emotional bonds, and how learning to express one's attachment needs to a responsive partner can build emotional bonds that last a lifetime. As a couple therapist, I can attest to the truth of what she says here.
7. In Defense of Food (2008)
My wife, 11 year-old daughter, and I listened to this together on our summer vacation this year. We have always been big believers in what is written here so we were already eating a lot like he recommends. But this book is a must read for anyone who wants to understand why the Western diet is so unhealthy. Michael Pollan is a gifted journalist and funny writer and he makes the experience educational and interesting. His advice, "Eat food, mostly plants, not too much" is just brilliant and is explained in great detail throughout the book.6. The Gifts of Imperfection (2010)
This book was a revelation! I came across it on a fluke after watching her incredibly popular Tedx Talk on the Power of Vulnerability. It is the 4th most watched Ted Talk of all time and has been view over 22 million times.Brene Brown has the rare ability to translate academic research into meaningful ideas that can directly impact our lives. Brown bases her book on 8 years of research on shame. If you are like most people, reading a book about shame doesn't sound like a good time, I know. But I have to say that this is one of the most meaningful books I have read in the past 10 years. Brown coins the new phrase "wholehearted living" to define a group of people who live life with their whole hearts, a group who are able to take risks and be emotionally vulnerable. In doing so, they discover increased courage, compassion, and connections with others. This book made an immediate impact on my therapy practice, and it has given me much to think about in how I can better live a more authentic life.
5. The Mindful Brain (2007)
4. David & Goliath (2013)
Malcolm Gladwell is a unique story teller. The premise of this book is that what we oftentimes see as our strengths can actually be a disadvantage, and what we oftentimes see as a disadvantage, can actually be a strength.I particularly enjoyed his analysis of the impact of small classroom size on learning, how dyslexia might be a "desirable disadvantage," and how Martin Luther King and other civil rights leaders created social change through their marginalized positions. The "big pond" theory was tremendous and worth the read in and of itself - particularly as it related to higher education.
3. Man's Search for Meaning (1946)
To put it simply, if I could only have 5 books while stranded on a desert island for the rest of my life, this would be one of them. I read this a second time 22 years after reading it the first time. With age and experience, I was much better able to understand the message he conveys. This book is a personal account of one man's experience in a concentration camp, and it is an unparalleled exploration of the psychology of how suffering caused by unavoidable circumstances can either be a cause for despair and hopelessness, or a vehicle for growth and progression.
The book is ultimately about finding meaning in life and making sense of our suffering. The message of the book - that love and beauty can come from our greatest suffering is perhaps one of the greatest messages of hope that exist in all of literature.
2. Quiet (2012)
This book was the most comprehensive and insight psychologically based book I have read since discovering the Road Less Traveled 25 years ago. Susan Cain has done an amazing job not only helping others to see how introversion/extroversion plays out in the dominant US culture, but she has compiled a wealth of psychological studies that are summarized with stunning clarity and brilliant personal insight. A few of the highlights of this book include her summary of the emerging body of research on 'high reactive' and 'sensitive' temperaments in Chapter 4-5. And Chapter 6 which details how the introversion of Eleanor Roosevelt balanced FDR's extroversion is an exceptional piece of research and writing.
I have taken the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) Test 3 times over the past 25 years. Each time I regrettably scored as an introvert. For years, I was embarrassed by this label as I felt it meant I was destined to be shy, socially awkward, and not outgoing. However, this book has helped me see that those are inaccurate myths and that introversion carries with it a host of strengths. It also helped me better understand why I chose to be a professor and a therapist.
#1 Non-Fiction Book (Tie)
#1 Non-Fiction Book (Tie)
1. I am Malala (2013)
Malala Yousafzai is a hero of mine. This is an amazing story, and I absolutely recommend it to you. I have always been impressed with Malala ever since I heard her story and saw her speech at the UN about the importance of education for girls. She is also the youngest person to win the Nobel Peace Prize - at only 18 years old.
She stands for things that are truly important - education for girls, equal rights for women, forgiving others who have harmed you, and having the convictions to fight for what you believe in. And she has overcome emotional and physical trauma and continues to rise above it in her fight for education for girls throughout the world.
Malala's story should be read by everyone. I am proud to say it was the inaugural book in the bookclub I started with my graduate students in October of this year. My 11-year old daughter read the book and participated in the bookclub which made me feel proud, as this is the entire point of Malala's message.
1. The Boys in the Boat (2013)
The emotional center of the book is Joe Rantz – a young man who endured enormous hardship to earn a spot on the boat. And the wisdom of the book is found in George Yeoman Pocock – the famed British shellbuilder. In the lives of Rantz and his teammates, the virtues of work, humility, and sacrifice are contrasted with stunning clarity to the vices of corruption, power, and hatred in the German government in the 1930s. The way Brown intertwines the two stories is brilliant, and the book doubles as an in-depth history lesson to the events leading up to World War II.
The power of this book is in Brown’s ability to describe the transcendent nature of the connection the boys developed through rowing - how when each member of the crew truly gave up the self and fully trusted in the others, they achieved something far greater than personal accomplishment and success; that in their words they experienced something that approached the divine.
Top 10 Fiction
10. Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance (1974)
9. Bel Canto (2001)
Like all great authors, Ann Patchett has the ability to incorporate small bits of insight about life into the nuances of her characters. It was an intriguing examination of the beauty of opera and life inside a 4 1/2-month long hostage stand off. A crazy combination, but it worked.
8. Hamlet Prince of Denmark (2014)
Another book recommended to me by my wife, and sure enough it was great. This book was adapted from the play specifically to be performed as an audiobook as a dramatized novel. The themes here are the big ones: power, politics, betrayal, revenge, family, love, loyalty, & tragedy. I saw the actual play about a month later - and while the play was fantastic - I actually enjoyed this telling of the story a lot more.7. The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian (2007)
I read this book in 2008 and again this year. It is an excellent book about an adolescent boy living on a Indian reservation in Washington. It's funny and insightful and contains some excellent character development. This is a great story about the importance of one's culture, finding your way in the world through struggle and hard work, and ultimately about the importance of friendship.
6. All the Light We Cannot See (2014)
This won the Pulitzer Prize this year and I can see why. The author packs intense imagery into every sentence and each chapter was never more than 2-3 pages. You would think this would fail, but it worked. I was interested the whole time, and the story is multi-layered and thought provoking. 5. The Snow Child (2012)
I would have never read this book without the recommendation of my wife, and I am so glad I did. First time novelist Eowyn Ivey wrote a book that is difficult to capture - but what I loved most was the explorations of love, loss, grief, and joy - as experienced through marriage, friendship, and the love of a child. It has a beautiful emotional tone and a fairy tale like quality. Maybe the best way for me to characterize it is a beautiful bedtime story for adults - one that you would want a loved one to tell to you as you sat near a fire wrapped in a warm blanket.4. Beautiful Ruins (2012)
What I love most about this book was the pure originality of the story telling - bouncing between 1962 Italy and present day Hollywood. He delivers full chapters in various forms that really show his command as a writer. If you are looking for an original and intelligent book - one that may make you laugh, cry, and reflect, I think you will like Beautiful Ruins.
3. What Alice Forgot (2011)
2. A Man Called Ove (2013)
I absolutely loved this book from the first chapter and it never let up. I loved the story, the characters, and the author's ability to seamlessly use similes that always made me laugh. What a wonderful and warm character study of a 59-year old Swedish curmudgeon. The book was also laugh-out-loud funny and unexpectedly moving.
1. Euphoria (2014)
This was my favorite fiction book this year, and it wasn't even close. I loved it so much that I read it twice within 3 months. It is a fictionalized account of Margaret Mead's anthropological studies of the tribes of New Guinea in the 1920s. Lily King's words are like poetry to me. There were many times when I would shake my head in amazement at her ability to capture the complexities of an experience in a single sentence - when she could capture the subjective realities and relationships of her characters just as precisely and exactly as I could possibly imagine.
I loved the beauty of the story and the exploration of anthropology. It is a field I would have deeply enjoyed. The book provides rich observations about human nature and relationships. It worked on every level for me.
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